Wednesday, October 22, 2008

What's for Dinner?


I need some new dinner ideas. I'm tired of the same old pasta dishes and broiled salmon.

My sister sent me a crock pot recipe that calls for two ingredients: a chicken and a can of Molson beer. You put them in the crock pot and in a few hours...you have a yummy meal. Sadly, I will not be partaking as I do not, nor will I ever, own a crock pot. I hear they are great and those that have them, love them. But there is something just a little too Samantha Stevens about crock pots for me. I can just see Darin strutting through those louvre doors into the kitchen, lifting the cover of the crock pot and inhaling the aroma of the pot roast that Sam has had cooking all day while he has been slaving in the office with Mr. Tate.

So I made my first vegan meal last night. Tofu in an eggplant and spicy garlic sauce. I thought it was rather yummy, myself. Jim said it would have tasted better with chicken or pork (at least he didn't say steak and potatoes). Beck thought the tofu felt like scrambled eggs, but tasted like nothing. And Maddie? She sobbed. Seriously - sobbed. I kid you not. To say she is a finicky eater is putting it mildly. Sobbed. I don't think it was the taste buds acting alone; she's also got an abundance of hormones raging through her system and she's got a major head cold (which you would think might help her out in this case)...but sobbing? And through her sobs she demanded, "how do you expect me to eat this?" Whoa. I told her to get control of herself and grab an apple and some peanut butter.

So tonight I grilled some mango chicken sausages with baby yellow, orange and red peppers. I stayed away from the green variety as Jim informed me that they make him gassy. For those of you who don't know Jim, I am pretty sure that air and water make him gassy, so how he zeroed in on the green pepper is simply beyond me. But I heeded his warning nonetheless. And then I mixed them with caramelized onions and put it all on a yummy roll. And I served it with mac and cheese. Jim gobbled it up and then proceeded to pass gas. An appreciative gesture, I'm sure, but so much for avoiding the green peppers. Beck informed me that he liked breakfast sausage better. Duly noted, dude. And Maddie? Sobbed. SWEAR. Another night of tears at the dinner table. And tonight I didn't offer the apples and peanut butter option. (um, hello? mac and cheese? need I say more?) I also informed her that one more night of tears at the dinner table would ensure that she gets no dinner at all and an early bed time. Not exactly punishment for the girl who would rather do just about anything than eat a healthy meal. (did I mention that I also made chocolate chip cookies for dessert?)

Then I told her that next week she can plan a meal and I will execute it and I promised not to cry while doing so. Her meal of choice? White meat chicken with nothing on it and raw carrots. Ok, on second thought, maybe I will cry; she makes toddlers look adventurous when it comes to food. I can assure you that she doesn't have an eating disorder, she just doesn't like food. Unless it's pasta (with no sauce), peanut butter, yogurt (only vanilla), raw carrots, and the occasional apple. She will hunker down on a cookie, but not any old cookie - for instance if it is a chocolate chip cookie - it can't have too many chips. (and so I made some today that only had two or three chips in them. Can you say enabler?)

My daughter and I share a lot of similarities, but my love for food and her lack thereof is certainly not one of them. One day I will make something for dinner that she will love and beg for more, in the meantime, I will keep a lot of peanut butter (only Jif. Jif Creamy to be exact.) and apples (not green. Only red. And they can't be cold.) on hand for her. And a big bottle of wine for me.

3 comments:

Mike's Universal said...

Best one yet! Note to Jim: Beano?

Karen said...

What a lively dinner table, what with all the farting and the sobbing! Does your family know you're sharing their intimate secrets? If so, they're good sports. Hilarious! I have to say, I walked into your sister's house yesterday after she had cooked her crock-pot creation all day (BTW, it was turkey not chicken and Blue Moon not Molson) and I have to say it smelled divine. But I'm with you on the crock-pot embargo.

Anonymous said...

L, do me a favor and take your butt to Bojangles. The best meal ever. you may not like the idea but you don't have to do a thing but put the paper containers in the trash. They WILL love it.