The Chosen One

So the Idol hysteria has just about died down. I've heard from many of you that Adam was robbed and that Kris is too white bread, middle America and not very talented.

It happens every year; the loser's partisans generate stormy protests about alleged voting improprieties that cost their star, the runner-up, the Idol crown. I love a good conspiracy theory and they seem to run rampant after each and every Idol season.

I didn't vote, so I was in no way responsible for the victory. But, yes, I am pleased that Kris won the trophy, pleased because I prefer his style of music over Adam's. I would choose acoustic guitar over screaming rock n' roll any day of the week. With that said, I have no doubt that if I were to party with Kris and Adam, I would have a lot more fun with Adam. And, something tells me that my political and religious views are more in line with Adam's than with Kris's. I may have vanilla taste in music, but my thoughts on politics and religion are more Cherry Garcia.

But the bottom line is...there can be only one American Idol. Adam was a truly gracious runner-up who, I'm sure, will go on to be very successful and prove that you don't have to win the title to be a worldwide star. America did not chose him this year, but he is certainly not a loser.

Yesterday my son came home from school with the year's final monthly newsletter. I glanced over the paragraph about dress code revisions and the one about summer math review suggestions (that will never happen) and stopped at the new guest policy for next year. Many parents enjoy going to school to have lunch with their child. When they do, they sit at a table reserved for visitors and their child gets to invite a friend or two to join them. (Personally, I'd prefer to sit at the table with all the kids, but that's not how it's done.)

Well, according to the newsletter, teachers have noticed that some children feel excluded and left out when they are not chosen to accompany the parent and child. And then the teacher has to deal with hurt feelings. So, beginning next year, when parents come for lunch, the school asks that they enjoy that time with their child and their child alone - no friends - and more importantly, no hurt feelings.

Rrrreally? Really? Necessary?

God forbid the kids learn the lesson that they will not always be included. It's easier to simply eliminate any circumstance where feelings might be hurt. I wonder if they still pick teams for kick ball these days? Probably not, being chosen last could send a kid into therapy for years. I'm not saying it's easy, I'm just saying eventually kids are going to have to learn that life isn't always fair and sometimes it sucks and sometimes...you are not chosen. Dealing with those feelings is a part of growing up. Heck, it's a part of being a grown up, as well.

I read it again: "The teacher has to deal with the hurt feelings." What is that about? Apparently explaining to the children that they will not always be chosen is not an option? It's not as if the child "left out" is put in a closet and told to eat alone; they remain at the table with 20 classmates, for crying out loud! How much could that hurt?

Something tells me that Adam had his feelings hurt a time or two when he was a kid. And I bet you anything those experiences helped him become such a gracious runner-up. I'm all about sparing feelings, but not at the expense of raising a generation of sore losers.