Michael Johns? Are you freaking kidding me? Granted I didn't vote, but 31 million people did and they made a big mistake. Huge, in fact. What was up with Ryan mentioning the fact that nobody went home last year at this time on account of Idol Gives Back (hinting that perhaps Michael would stick around) and then pulling the rug out from under us by sending Michael John on his way? That was just wrong, dawg. Ugly and wrong.
But Michael handled it like a champ. No tears. No regrets. He acknowledged that "Dream On" was the perfect song to sing on his way out and then proceeded to sing it beautifully. It really should have been Kristy Lee Cook singing her final song. Or Syesha. Or Carly. Hell, I would even give you Brooke tonight (at least she could sing at her sister's wedding this weekend). But it shouldn't have been Michael John. Not yet.
I'm afraid I OD'ed on Idol tonight. I zoomed through Idol Gives Back and then went right into the elimination show. I feel like I've been watching Ryan Seacrest for 3 days straight. Is he the hardest working man in Hollywood, or what? And how about the presidential candidates doing their bit? Of course Obama's was by far the best so everybody should vote for him in November. America got it wrong tonight - let's not get it wrong in November. (shameless plug).
So I will restrain from saying anything harsh about Idol Gives Back. It is a great cause and I did my part by donating (well, my husband donated as I have yet to pick up a phone before, during or after Idol and intend to keep it that way). The highlight for me was Jimmy Kimmel. The guy is hilarious. And while his Simon roast didn't compare to his "I'm F*ing Ben Affleck" video, it was still very entertaining. Almost as entertaining as watching Fergie do a one-handed tinsica while singing with Heart in those painted on pleather pants that accentuated her Fergalicious booty. Almost.
And since my family donated to the cause, I feel like I have earned the right to take one swing at Miley Cyrus. I realize that she's only 15 and probably a good role model and all that happy horseshit, but she's a little too comfortable in that 15 year old skin of hers. A little too in awe of herself. Yeah, I don't get her.
And I don't get Robin Williams, either. I must confess that I fast forwarded through his entire "performance" (and I use that term loosely), but I'm going to guess that he sounded a lot like Mork from Ork. He will always be Mork from Ork in my mind. I didn't want to see Mork when he was with Mindy and I don't want to see him on the Idol stage. You either get Robin Williams or you don't and I've got my feet firmly planted in the latter camp.
Technically, I don't think my family donated enough funds to go off on anybody else, so I'll only say good things from this point forward. Loved Daughtry. Cause he's hot. And he can sing. And he's humble (note to Miley Cyrus: see footage of Daughtry to learn the meaning of humble). Maybe he can find a place in his band for Michael Johns? Or maybe Michael John can tour with Daughtry as his opening act. That would be the best of both worlds. Get it? The Best of Both Worlds? (I can't believe I just gave a shout out to Miley Cyrus).
Wow. And I still can't believe Michael Johns got the boot. Damn. I need to change the pictures on my blog. But I can't right now because I'm too tired and half to get up at the crack of dawn. So, that's all I've got tonight.
Why doesn't Ryan say, "Seacrest, out." anymore? I liked that line. If he's not going to use it anymore, I will....